episode 7 : Shopping & self bliss

Splendour yesterday!!! I went out with 'A' spending the whole day together..having breakfast at dome really gave us the energy..at 1st, we went shopping and spent over rm700 at topshop&topman. aint that heaven?? then 'A' got a haircut at klcc..after all that 'A' said, "u..i lapa laa.." haahha..shopping really made us hungry..then i said," oraite..lets hit pavi..!!" Wandering around looking for a place..then we just decided to hit carl's jr...too lazy too think of a better place..-haihh-
The act of burning holes in the pocket doesnt stop there...refreshing our body aroma came into the mind..looking for a new scent and splurged in parkson. 'A' got a fragrance from hugo and i got the new escada : incredible me!!! yeah..the new incredible izzati..!!!
Going back to klcc..we pampered ourselves at The nail parlour..getting manicure including pedicure is what we did..and my nails got a french twist on it..im just soo happy :D
Lastly i got myself a new pair of shoe..a girl just cant live without a range of shoess..aint we??? -rolled eyes-
then 'A' wanted to have a drink at chilli's before we get back..







ouhh ouh ouh...and before i end this happy episode...
i saw H at pavi.. : /
he's with this new girl..is not that im jealous or whatever u call it..im happy that he finally moved on after our 1year plus together...that girl is sweet and innocent i can say from her dressing..funny when i looked at her,reminds me of his gf before me..we bumped into each other..i said 'hye H'..the only thing he did just raised lil bit of his eyebrows and gave a little gesture....and i thought 'thats it???'
Thats it??? is that all you can do?? dissapointment possessed my happy feelings..im not hoping he would still have feelings for me..but at least..tegur me macam kawan..x boleh ke??
let bygone be bygones..i know he hard times at the end of our relationship...but c'mon mann.. -sigh-


well i guess..nothing will always be beautiful in this world..
sentiasa akan ada bintik2 hitam di atas kanvas putih hidup ini..
-wink- (",)

love,
me..
xoxo

episode 6 : i deserve better - part II

here is just some sayings that i forgot to include earlier...maybe this thing happens to u too..and its just some of my thought bout it..


I just cant understand the hearts of men
they tell you they want you and then they leave you
this is the first time, you're special
I believed those words and I was so happy
you should have told me you didn't like me any more
but I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
although I will curse you I'll still miss you
since I am a girl, to whom love is everything
i heard that if you give up things too easily
to a man, he will get bored with you
i don't think this is wrong
a girl says that she will never be fooled again
but she will fall in love again
the pain
it's not enough to describe how i feel
we were so happy together
but I know now
I've been blind
you told me that you'd never let me down
whenever I needed you you'd always be here
I can forgive but I cant forget
even though you hurt me
I still gonna miss you
don't take advantage of a girl's willingness to do anything for love
and her caring instinct
i didn't know that to be born as a girl and to be loved was so hard
although i will curse you i'll still miss you

episode 5 : i deserve better.

i care bout what other people feels so much until i forgot bout mine..
that night..i just cant do that to myself anymore..i realized,its me that i should care about..i deserve to be treated better than this..so i made a big step.i told him everything..i had enough with it..i wont let myself be fooled again..love aint just about being with the person that we love..its more than that,including letting that person off by our side..
now we r total folks.. i feel empty..but wont let the emptyness stop me from having tonnes of fun!! I'm gonna enjoy every bits of my life with my own way,my own style..nothing can stop me now..actually i feel much lighter..no burden,no problems anymore to jam my own brain..hahha..
I am totally gonna face a new chapter of me with a new fresh start...im moving on..there's so much in life that need to be explore and there's not much time left...

that's it 4 now..

love,
me!!!!
xoxo

episode 4 : heartless

dont know whether im influenced by the peers or its truly me. but tonight by looking at 'it'..tear my heart to pieces. he projects a pure confusion to me..loves me and letting me go...loves me and doesnt want to torture me..loves me and break my heart??? well thank you very much darling..im so tortured right now and my heart crushed! i hate u as much as i love u..i hate you when you said those beautiful words which probably means nothing to you but give a thousands meanings to me while its just another false hope of yours..memories when i was with you surrounded my everyday life..with those memories,i open my eyes every morning with a hope that maybe there's some sense got into your brain and you'll be with me..but still it doesnt..
because of you,i have no interested in other guys out there who actually can treat me better than what you did..you turn me into a heartless bitch..yes,i may have had hurt you..but what you did to me now,its worse..
you want me..but you dont want to walk beside me..if so,just stop giving me this false hopess!! this heart cant take it anymore..just say that 'hard word'..it will hurt me,but just in a short period..i rather its like that than hurting me all the way long like this..
just save me before its getting harder to mend all the broken pieces of my heart back together..

love and hate..there's only a fine thin line that separates them..
i dont wanna stand on the line forever..show me which side to step on..
i dont wanna be a heartless bitch..show me what i wanna see..


love,
me..

xoxo